George Kostanza from Seinfield is the reason that my marriage is a success.
Let me explain.
On one particular episode, George decides his entire life is screwed up and decides that in the future, that no matter what his first instinct is, he will do the opposite. For example, he would normally refrain from telling a beautiful woman that he’s just met that he’s unemployed. When he does the opposite, the beautiful woman is instantly attracted to him. When he goes on an interview, instead of the suit and professional demeanor he’d normally use, he goes in sweats and eats during the interview. Of course, he gets the job.
My parents were married for 31 years. They were not particularly happy years. There was a lot of arguing, blatant dishonesty, etc. So, when I married Moo, I was worried about perpetuating the same mistakes.
On one occasion in the first few weeks of our marriage, Moo and I were having a disagreement and I asked my mother for advice. She told me that the situation was none of his business and I should do what I wanted.
Yes. She said that.
I decided this was a poor way to address a problem when I had stood up in front of our families, friends and God and swore to be a good partner to Moo.
Instead, I did the opposite and Moo and I were able to quickly resolve the issue – to the satisfaction of both.
Since then, I’ve used what I call the George Kostanza method whenever any issue comes up in our marriage. I figure out what my parents would do and I do the opposite.
So far, it works.
As Jerry says: “If every instinct you have is wrong, the opposite must be right.”
For more marriage advice and how to keep your marriage or save your relationship or how to get back your ex, check out The Magic of Making Up.